Toledot 5764 – Gilayon #318


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Parashat Toldot

WHEN THE BOYS GREW UP, ESAU BECAME A SKILLFUL HUNTER, A MAN

OF THE OUTDOORS; BUT JACOB WAS A MILD MAN, WHO STAYED IN CAMP. I SAAC FAVORED

ESAU BECAUSE HE HAD A TASTE FOR GAME; REBEKAH LOVED JACOB.

(Bereishit 25)

 

When love is conditional upon a cause,

when that cause ends, so does the love. Unconditional love is everlasting.

(Pirkei Avot 5: 16)

 

"Isaac favored Esau

because he had a taste for game" – Because when his father would ask

him, "What do you do in the field all day?" he would excuse himself,

saying, "[I go there] in order to hunt game to bring to my father."

And since he didn't spend time with his mother, she did not love him. She loved

Jacob who was always with his mother, and all of her affection was directed

towards him.

It may be possible to explain

that he [Isaac] only loved him [Esau] during those moments, but after he ate

the game, when the cause ends, so does the love. But Rebekah loved Jacob

unconditionally, and such a love is eternal.

(Keli Yakar 25: 28)

 

 

MOTHER OF JACOB AND ESAU

Haim Rubinstein

 

The

origins of the conflict are draped in darkness. As if its foundations were

primordial. From the womb. A genetic conflict. The sides are separated by an

abyss. They are opposites of each other. Oil and water. A wild-man with

bloodied hands, as against a gentle youth, whose fingers caress the pages of

books. One is red, sporting a hairy mantle (25:25). The other – perhaps

black-haired and pale.

Two

characters. Two "others". Opposites. Rivals. The dynamic story of

bridging, but not self-compromising. The complicated process of rivalry,

clashes, separation, and kissing. A possible cyclical dance of love and hate. It

is difficult to perceive the original roots of enmity in this fiendish dance. Israel

here and Edom there, Jacob and Esau, a breach between worlds, across thousands

of years, an ocean between them. Jacob and Esau are brothers. One upon the heel

of the other. They both emerged from the same womb as twins. Tumim [the

Torah spells Hebrew word for twins missing the letter alef] to let you know

that something is defective in this twinning. Despite the genetic similarity,

despite the shared identity at the moment of birth – they are different. Brothers,

yet different. The external differences are essential. Two worlds, two

cultures.

Deeper

strata hide below the surface (I am indebted to my son Or, who brought the

following ideas to light in our joint study). The brother's jealousy rests upon

a split between the parents. The depth of the rift spans the generations. Isaac

and Rebekah are not joined hand-to-hand. The differences between them are

emphasized in all of the descriptions of their intimacy/distance. The first

encounter between the girl taken from the house of her father – his uncle, by

their servant Eliezer, and the master's son is described as a passive

relationship: And she said to the servant, "who is that man

walking in the field toward us?" And the servant said, "That

is my master." So she took the veil and covered herself. It

seems that this veil brought from Padan Aram would always separate between

Isaac and his wife. When the local people asked him about his wife, he said, "She

is my sister" (26:7). It appears that the word "love", Isaac

then took her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he took Rebekah as his

wife. Isaac loved her, and thus found comfort after his mother's death (24:67), spoken in one breath

with his consolation over his mother's death, brings to light how cold Isaac's

relationship with Rebekah was, from the very start. The tension between passive

Isaac and active Rebekah projects upon the relations between Jacob and Esau. Isaac

favored Esau because he had a taste for game; Rebekah loved Jacob.

Isaac,

the silent man, preferred the one who was strong, charismatic, who set out each

morning to his day's work, to man's incessant battle against a dangerous

environment. Rebekah, the mother, preferred her soft, delicate son.

The

parasha is wrapped in strained relationships. Secondary descriptions echo the

main story. Avimelekh's anger. What have you done to us? The dispute

with the shepherds. Isaac and Rebekah's disapproval of Esau's marriage. Life is

layered with opportunities for friction. Padded with disagreements.

A

strong connection between the parties lies at the foundation of each quarrel. The

flash of hatred expresses the intensity of the relationship. Then his

brother emerged, holding on to Esau's heel. The negative

relationship is bound-up in manacles of norms, prejudices, customs and

cultures, which strengthen and reinforce polarization. A reversal is necessary

to change a hater to a lover. Reversal rather than connection. It is necessary

to tear away the veils and partitions in order to create cooperative living

between opposites. So it seems.

In

practice, disconnection is needed to achieve reversal. More precisely:

Recognition, separation, distancing, reversal and reconnection.

Rebekah,

the boys' mother, prompts the recognition that the differences are external. She

enlightens Isaac's darkened eyes, and brutally makes it clear to him that that

there is no guarantee that his senses will discover the truth. Externalities

can confuse. Reliance on familiar indicators is insufficient for the probing of

hearts. When he discovered that she was right, he became fearful. Isaac was

seized with very violent trembling (27: 33). He was suddenly struck by the

comprehension of how poorly he knew his sons. He was shrouded by a strong

awareness of missed opportunities. The accepted order and hierarchies melted

away. Who received the proper blessing? Who should be granted the status of the

first-born? Who is the strange "other", and who the near, the "similar"?

The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau. The

external signs, the mane of hair, the voice, smell, and clothing no longer mark

the "right" side, the "just" party to the conflict. The

simple world, divided between sides, has blurred. Suddenly, the next required

stage becomes clear. Distancing. Weakening the factors supporting conflict. Preparation

for the needed metamorphosis. Readiness for reversal.

The

conflict cannot be resolved in the present way. Its deeper strata live and

exert their influence. The dialogue taking place between the sons via their

parents ends in failure. Enmity increases, walls are raised higher. Now Esau

harbored a grudge against Jacob…and Esau said to himself, "Let

but the mourning time of my father come, and I will kill my brother Jacob"

(27:41).

The

disagreement has no forced, external, solution. Separation is required during

the interim period. Jacob flees, distances himself from the threat. He goes to

his mother's family, and Esau goes to his father's. Each to his tribe. Two

nations apart while still in your body. Distance from the basic irritants

will contribute to the process. They will aid the next stage. They clear space

for the genuine inner work. For the process of transformation.

Many

issues must be contended with internally in order to cross the dividing chasm. We

don't know what Esau went through. The next parasha concentrates on Jacob. Through

it we may understand the parallel process that both brothers passed through.

Jacob's

departure, his maturation, his work and his marriages, together with his

fatherhood, allowed him to contend with the devils inside him. To wrestle with

his inner demons. Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until

the break of dawn. Wrestling that changed him physically and spiritually. An

essential change. From Okev (one-who-comes-next) to Sara-El

(One-who-strives-with-the-divine"). From a youth pulled along after his

brother to a striving, independent personality. Said he, "Your name

shall no longer be Jacob, but Israel, for you have strived with beings divine

and human, and have prevailed."

Jacob's

victory over his ghosts that visited him in the dead of night, the crossing of

his private Yabok, prepared him to confront his prejudices, to contend with the

different, the other, with his brother Esau. It changed him into a new person,

better prepared – Israel.

The

flight, exile, hard work, and self-confrontation brought Jacob to the place

where he could meet Esau, hug him, and kiss him. That connection is an

expression of mutual reconciliation. Of compromise. Of the dissipation of

tensions. It is a good-by hug. A peaceful parting. This traveled to Seir, the

other to Sukkot. They each became reconciled with the other's existence. Distant

neighbors.

There

is symbolism in Jacob's final destination. Sukkot, perhaps Sukkat "Shalom",

in accordance with the numerical value of Esau (= 376="shalom"), to

tell you that "one should greet everyone with peace (shalom), even

idolaters" (Baal Haturim, Bamidbar 6: 28).

Haim Rubinstein is an educator.

 

 

The Third Temple Will Only Be Built Only Through Peace

They did not fight over the

third well, because the third Temple will be built by the Messiah of whom it is

said, In token of abundant authority and of peace without limit (Isaiah

9:6), for there shall only be peace and truth in his day, that is why it was

called Rehovot, for then God will expand (yirhav) their borders. When

conflict is afoot or two sides combat each other, even if they be in a city as

large as Antioch it will not offer enough room for them to live together. Even

the most spacious location will be too small for them and will not be able to

bear them, as is, in our iniquity, our custom to this day. The opposite will be

true when there is peace upon Israel. Even though we will be fruitful in the

land and many will be its inhabitants, in any case the Land shall be spacious

for them and no one will trouble them… for in a time of peace, we shall

increase in the land, for they will have no cause to leave it.

(Keli Yakar 26: 22)

 

The Sword Brings Hurban (Destruction)

And I say that the reason for

the commandment (But if you make for Me an altar of stones, do not build it

out of hewn stones; for by wielding your sword upon them you have profaned them

– Shemot 20:22) is that iron is a sword (herev) and it destroys (mahriv)

the world and so it is named. Esau, who is hated by the Lord (Malachi

1:3) inherited the sword, for he [Jacob] said to him, by your sword shall

you live (Bereishit 27:40), and the sword is his power in heaven and on

earth, for in Mars and the bloody constellations the sword shall prevail, and

in them its valor shall be seen. Therefore, it will not be brought to the house

of the Lord. That is the reason why scripture explicitly mentions do not

build it out of hewn stones, since by wielding any iron [implement] to make

them so, you wielded over them your murderous sword which kills many, and have

profaned it. That is why there was no iron in the Mishkan; although it would

have been preferable to make its stakes out of iron, they were made of copper. Similarly,

none of the vessels of the Temple were made of iron, except for the knives,

since the actual slaughter is not considered part of worship, and scripture

only prohibited building with stones hewn with iron tools, because it referred

to wielding your sword upon them, and included in this is do not wield

an iron tool over them (Devarim 27:5)

(Ramban Shemot 20:22)

 

By your sword shall you live – Since his [Esau's] occupation was that of

an out-doors man who hunts in the wilderness and in ruined and desolate places,

it was appropriate for him to receive the blessing of the sword, and the planet

Mars which is associated with the spillers of blood has great power over

destruction and the sword, so Esau's seed inherited the sword. His sar

[patron angel] is the killing power with whom the sword is associated. For this

reason the Torah prohibited the sword and iron in the Mishkan and Temple; in

regard to the Mishkan, it is written, gold, and silver, and copper

(Shemot 25) and there was no iron there what-so-ever. In regard to the Temple,

it is written no hammer or ax or iron tool was heard in the house while it

was being built (I Kings, 6), since iron is for swords and it destroys the

world, while the Temple preserves the world. And you shall serve your

brother – when Jacob is worthy. But when you grow restive – when he

is not worthy – you shall break his yoke from your neck. And that is the

intention of Onkelos when he translated it, "When his children transgress

the words of the Torah [you shall break his yoke…]."

(Rabeinu Behayei 27: 40).

 

God's Blessing is not Inherited, but Rather Dependent on Personal

Behavior

God blessed Abraham that the

special ones, the people chosen as God's portion, will arise from among his

progeny. The Lord will be their God and His presence will dwell among them. They

will inherit the Land and be sanctified to their God. Abraham did not pass on this

blessing to Isaac, for it is not within the power of humans to bequeath such a

blessing to their children. It depends upon the people's holiness and the

goodness of their deeds. Only after Abraham's death did God give Isaac this

blessing. And so, Isaac did not intend to bless his children with Abraham's

blessing, for he knew that his blessing would be useless, since only one

prepared to receive it may be blessed in this way by God.

(Malbim 27: 1)

 

 

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