And if it comes to pass that Pharaoh calls you and asks, 'What is your occupation?'

You shall say, 'Your servants have been owners of livestock from our youth until now, both we and our ancestors,' so that you may dwell in the land of Goshen, because all shepherds are abhorrent to the Egyptians."

(Bereishit 46:33-34)

 

because all shepherds are abhorrent to the Egyptians - This is a sign that the Egyptians did not eat meat in those days and they would not permit anyone to sacrifice sheep, as is this case with today's Indians. And if someone was a shepherd, that would be abhorrent because he drank milk. The people of India will neither eat nor drink anything coming from a sentient being unto this day.

(Ibn Ezra Bereishit 46:34)

 

In a land such as Egypt, where a person is judged only on the basis of his labor, where a person is born not as a person but as an artisan, a farmer, soldier, etc. - the question regarding occupation would naturally be the first question. But they will fearlessly declare the unpleasant truth; the Egyptians' abhorrence of their occupation and the nations' general loathing of the Jews, are the primary means of survival for this tribe which is destined to pass the days in isolation. As long as the light of morality has not dawned upon the nations, the barriers that the nations raised against Israel protect him from contamination by the corruption of the peoples among whom he will walk for centuries.

(Rabbi S.R. Hirsch, Bereishit 46:33)

 

And Joseph could not restrain himself

Pinchas Leiser

These words which follow upon Judah's speech mark a dramatic turning point in the encounter between Joseph and his brothers. Up to now he was detached from them and abused them; from here on in he reveals his true identity to them and lends a different meaning to his presence in Egypt.

Then Joseph said to his brothers, "Please come closer to me," and they drew closer. And he said, "I am your brother Joseph, whom you sold into Egypt.

But now do not be sad, and let it not trouble you that you sold me here, for it was to preserve life that God sent me before you... And God sent me before you to make for you a remnant in the land, and to preserve [it] for you for a great deliverance. And now, you did not send me here, but God, and He made me a father to Pharaoh, a lord over all his household, and a ruler over the entire land of Egypt. (45:4-8)

In this passage, Joseph merely sets out the facts and reinterprets his sale as a divine mission, as if the brothers were simply playing an unconscious role in the divine plan.

It is different when, following Jacob's death, the brothers bring up their fear that Joseph will seek revenge against them. There Joseph takes a different tone:

But Joseph said to them, "Don't be afraid, for am I instead of God? Indeed, you intended evil against me, [but] God designed it for good, in order to bring about what is at present to keep a great populace alive. (50:19-20)

As I have already mentioned, in our parasha Joseph retroactively relates to his sale as something that advanced the divine plan. In parashat Vayehi, following Jacob's death, Joseph again relates to his brothers' evil intentions.

These hints in Scripture's language strengthen the hypothesis that Joseph understood both that events unfolded in accordance with God's will and that, at the same time, that does not absolve his brothers of their responsibility.

I think that the phrase and Joseph could not restrain himself also points to Joseph's uncontrolled reaction, at least according to those exegetes who view the word lehitapek [translated above as "restrain himself"] as philologically similar to the word ipuk - self-restraint. He wanted to restrain himself, but something stronger than him competed with that wish and overcame it.

We must then understand in what sense Joseph was unable to restrain himself.

R. Meir Simka MiDvinsk, the author of Meshekh Hokhma, views Joseph's reaction as involving a kind of calculated moral decision:

Could not restrain himself before all those attending - This means to say that he wanted to control himself and to maneuver Jacob into fulfilling [the dream of] The sun and the moon... bowing down to me. There was no reason for him to pity his brothers, for they paid him no heed when he pleaded with them, but it was not proper [for him to continue manipulating them] before all the attendants who were not aware of the whole story; to them he would appear as a cruel person with a merciless, evil heart. He could not control himself because of all those attending him.

According to this interpretation, Joseph relinquished the full realization of his dreams and his justified vengeance in order to avoid seeming cruel to his Egyptian attendants.

Don Yitzhak Abarbanel presents an alternative approach:

The eleventh question: Could not restrain himself before all those attending him (45:1). For if the matter of it was as Rashi stated, that he could not bear having his Egyptian attendants see his brothers' embarrassment upon his making himself known to them, than it should have been stated as: and Joseph did not want and not could not. And if the matter is as RaMBaN stated, that he could not remain strong before all of his attendants, for they would have wanted him to forgive Benjamin - then it should have been stated that the only reason why Joseph did not make himself known to his brothers was that the Egyptians pleaded with him [and he did not want to create the impression that he was revealing his identity only thanks to the Egyptians' pleading] But that makes no sense, because, as I have explained, he had already finished punishing them tit for tat, and now he wanted to make himself known to them.

But Joseph could not control himself, etc. until and go up to my father (Bereishit 45: 1-8):

As Scripture mentioned above, the first time he heard his brothers say, but we are guilty for our brother (42:21), he was overcome with compassion - and he turned from them and wept and returned to them (42:24). The second time, when they brought the offering, it says: And Joseph made haste for he was overcome with compassion for his brothers and he wanted to weep and he entered the chamber and wept there, and he washed his face and went out and restrained himself and said, "place bread [before us]" (43:30-31). However, this third time, when he was fuller with compassion than in the previous instances, he had to turn away from them or hide in his chamber to weep there and regain self-control and return to them. And since Joseph could not restrain himself and hold back his weeping, nor to leave and enter his chamber in order to weep because of all those attending him - the men of his household who circled him from in front and from behind - he had to say: remove every man from my presence, so that everyone left and no man stood with him when Joseph made himself known to his brothers. The eleventh question is solved.

Abarbanel interprets Joseph's inability to restrain himself as a gradual softening-up, when in the final instance various factors keep him from being able to leave to another room in order to weep.

ShaDaL reads the phrase could not differently from the other commentators.

And Joseph could not: He first thought to hold Benjamin with him and send away his brothers without making himself known to them, but now when Judah told him and when he saw that the boy was not and had died, he was overcome by compassion for his father and he found himself forced to allow Benjamin to return to his father to keep his father from dying. Despite all of this his desire to draw Benjamin near to him remained strong. He found no stratagem by which Benjamin could be sent to his father and also brought near to himself other than making himself known to his brothers and calling upon them all to come to him. Or, perhaps it is as AHaM holds, that when he saw Judah's powerful efforts - his willingness to remain as a slave in Benjamin's place - he was overcome by compassion for his brothers and agreed to make himself known to them. However, he kept control of himself and did not make himself known to them because of the Egyptians who attended him in order that they would not hear unfavorable things about them [the brothers] - how they hated their brother and sold him. However, when Judah finished speaking he was so very overcome by compassion that he could no longer control himself and he had to cry out: Remove every man from my presence.

According to ShaDaL, Joseph actually wanted to keep Benjamin with him and not make himself known to his brothers, but he changed his mind out of consideration for his father or because he was impressed by Judah's readiness to take full responsibility for Benjamin.

All of the commentators who dealt with this phrase agree on one thing: that Joseph felt conflicted. Was the conflict between different desires or different values? Did his emotional condition keep Joseph from acting as he wanted?

I think Scripture does not allow us to reach an unambiguous decision favoring one of the interpretations - and perhaps for good reason.

Sometimes we must choose between competing values and desires; every time we come to a decision we must give up something. Sometimes it seems appropriate to behave with restraint but something stronger than us overcomes us and does not allow us to exercise self-control.

In Joseph's encounter with his brothers, his emotions overtook his desire to continue treating his brothers coldly, but even so he could restrain himself long enough for the non-family members who attended him to leave the room. In this way he kept the attendants from knowing that he had been sold.

Perhaps this parasha teaches us the proper balance between free expression of emotions and the need to find the correct time and place to express them.

Pinchas Leiser, the editor of Shabbat Shalom, is a psychologist

 

Vayigash elav Yehuda [Then Judah approached him] - R. Yehudah says: Approached for battle, as it is written, Then Yoav and the people who were with him approached to make battle. R. Nehemiah says: Approached to reconcile him, as it is written, then the children of Judah approached Joshua to reconcile him. The rabbis say: Approached to pray, as it is written, Elijah approached.

R. Eliezer combined the interpretations: If for war - I will come; if for reconciliation - I will come; if for prayer - I will come.

R. Meir says: Vayigash refers only to peace, for it is said, and they approached... and he inquired of their peace.

R. Yehudah says: Vayigash refers only to sacrifice, for it is written Vayigash [and he brought near] the bull of the sin-offering.

R. Yossi says: Vayigash refers only to rebuke, for it is said, and they said, draw close [gash hala].

R. Natan says: Vayigash refers only to touching, for it is said, Please draw near, and I will touch my son.

(Yalkut Shimoni Bereishit 44:150)

 

Who is Courageous? He Who Makes a Friend of his Enemy

Rabbi Shimon said: The firmament is made entirely of water and the angels entirely of fire [as we read] his servants are fiery flames. Yet the water does not extinguish the fire, nor does fire burn the water. Judah and Joseph; this is a lion, the other an ox. Yesterday they gored each other, and now one is sent as an emissary to the other, as it says: And he sent Judah before him. [Therefore,] say: He makes peace in His heights.

(Midrash Tanhuma VaYigash 6)

 

...from there on, Wind's spirit was lowered and he came politely. Since he treats me politely, I treat him politely as well. When he comes, I go out to meet him and ask him to sit with me on a bench in the garden between the trees. And he comes and sits. And when he comes he brings a nice fragrance from the mountains and from the valleys, and fans me as if with a fan. And since he acts like a perfect penitent, I do not remind him of his earlier deeds. And when he leaves me and goes, I ask him to return, as is customary with a good neighbor. Indeed, we are good neighbors, and I love him with a complete love. It is even possible that he loves me as well.

(S.Y. Agnon, Mei'Oyeiv le'Ohev pg. 482)

 

Words that Come from the Heart Enter the Heart - the Art of Diplomacy

A gentle response allays wrath; a harsh word provokes anger (Proverbs 15:1): King Solomon teaches in this verse that a person must train his soul and habituate his nature and tongue to offer gentle response, for a gentle response calms and sets aside the wrath of the angry, while harsh words - which are the opposite of gentle - give rise to anger and wrath.

(Rabbeinu Behayey on Parashat Vayigash)

 

Is Man Responsible for the Direction of his Actions and for their Results?

It was not you who sent me here, but God - But they sold him of their own volition, in order to harm him! And even if it developed that some benefit derived from the sale - their sin still stands, for a person is judged not by what happens to evolve from his actions, but only on the basis of his action and his intent; what happens to develop later neither adds nor detracts.

(Abarbanel on Bereishit 45:8)

 

It is very clear that everything that is produced in time must necessarily have a proximate cause, which has produced it. In its turn that cause has a cause and so forth till finally one comes to the First Cause of all things, I mean God’s will and free choice. For this reason all those intermediate causes are sometimes omitted in the dicta of the prophets, and an individual act produced in time is ascribed to God, it being said the He, may He be exalted, has done it...

Know you, that all proximate causes through which is produced in time that which is produced in time, regardless of whether these causes are essential and natural, or voluntary, or accidental and fortuitous - I mean by the voluntary cause of that particular thing produced time, the free choice of a man - and even if the causes are ascribed in the books of the prophets to God, may He be exalted. And according to their manner of expressing themselves, it is said of such an act that God did it or commanded it or said it...

(RaMBaM Guide for the Perplexed, II 48)

 

His heart failed... their father Jacob's spirit came to life: The Connection Between Body And Soul

His heart failed - His heart stopped beating and his breathing ceased, for cardiac activity stopped and he was as dead. This is a known phenomenon resulting from sudden joy. Medical texts state that the aged and weak may not be able to withstand this; many faint at the sudden reception of good tidings; the heart suddenly expands and opens, and the warmed blood goes out and spreads throughout the external portions of the body, and as a result of its cooling, the heart ceases. The old man fell as if dead, and he said that he believed them not, informing us that he stood a good part of the day, and he lies in silence because he did not believe them, for he knew that this fainting would lead to their shouting at him, accustoming him to this joy until it is absorbed in calm. This is the reason that they spoke to him all of Joseph's words which he had spoken to them, and when he saw the wagons etc. - they were shouting Joseph's words into his ears, and bringing the wagons before him, and then his spirit returned to him, and his breathing was restored, and he lived, and this is the meaning of their father Jacob's spirit came to life.

(RaMBaN, Bereishit 45:26)

 

Acquire us and our lands

Joseph, however, hated slavery, that a person should rule over another to his detriment. Therefore it is written, And Joseph acquired all the lands of Egypt for Pharaoh but he did not purchase them as slaves; the land alone became Pharaoh's property, whereas they were temporarily drafted to work for their bread, becoming day laborers in field work. Therefore Joseph said, Now that I have acquired you... today - This is to say: (You) temporarily, and your lands forever for Pharaoh. Therefore he transferred them to the cities, lest they continue to hold their land, for how can one discern that he acquired their lands if they (the sellers) were not sold and they continue to live on their land.

(Meshekh Hokhma, Bereishit 47:19)

 

 

 

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